I had an unanticipated experience while in San Diego this week. It was the result of finally getting my retired military ID. Due to the Navy’s current inability to meet their administrative responsibilities of timely paperwork processing, many veterans and retirees are left in a limbo status of being separated from the Navy, but not having the required paperwork to support that status. This is not a complaint on my part, even though this has a significant and negative impact on many people’s lives. Rather, it’s a statement of fact.
Because I did not have a DD-214 and my status had not been changed in “the system,” I had an active duty ID until August 3rd, despite having retired on May 31st. To be honest, I didn’t analyze how I felt about carrying an ID that did not accurately reflect my truth. I knew I was slightly uncomfortable showing my old ID, but because I did not have another option, “it was what it was.” Then the inevitable happened, the ID no longer scanned. And because I know my military brothers and sisters can appreciate what happened next, I’ll share:
I was that guy! The guy that is in the far gate lane during the morning rush whose ID doesn’t work so a HUGE backup ensues and then ALL lanes of traffic must be coordinated to stop so the dude can cross and unceremoniously execute the drive of shame to exit the base. Yep, that was me!
Luckily, the result was me getting my new “Retired” ID. The strange part was how I felt at finally having a correct, and legal, ID. I took some time to process my feelings. I had an unexpected sense of joy and relief, almost as if I was finally fully retired, despite being retired since May. It reinforced that how I identify myself is hugely important to my joy. The story I tell myself is critical to my comfort, confidence, and even health. The same story also contributes to my potential and success. The incorrect ID was impacting me more than I knew. How much more so the narrative I am telling myself, my wife, my kids, my friends, my business partners, etc.?
What I know is I am grateful to finally be “legal.” I am even more thankful things happened the way they did, allowing a seemingly simple process and experience to have a profound impact on my ability to analyze, and execute, my transition. The entire ordeal forced me deeper into myself, which is always time well spent.
Encouragement: take a few deep breaths in the frustrating and unideal moments and circumstances in life and allow them to be opportunities to become better. Walk this journey with others and see how you grow and flourish in unexpected ways.
Written by David Gutierrez
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